Sunday, February 26, 2017

art museums / galleries in berlin

January 22nd 2017
kindl - centre for contemporary art
Am Sudhaus 3, Berlin 12053
U8 Boddinstrasse

U7 Karl-Marx-Strasse

Wed - Sun 12 - 6 pm

Admission 5 eur ;free admission to the Kesselhaus beside the main building.

Two things I really like; contemporary art and beers.
Here you can absorb all that contemporary art inside a former brewery. So cool! It is also overall more relaxing experience to enjoy art because instead of the regular old-grumpy museum guards, there were just bored art history graduates sitting on their chair in the corner or the exhibition room with their iphone who obviously don't care about your existence at all.

The cafe is also not to be missed, such a cool place to enjoy your kindl (or schorle or coffee)!

January 29th 2017
Hamburger Bahnhof
Invaliden Strasse 50 - 51, Berlin 10557
S7, S75, S5, U55 S+U Hauptbahnhof

Tue, Wed, Fri 10 am - 6 pm, Thu 10 am - 8 pm, Sat - Sun 11 am - 6 pm
Admission 10 eur

Next stop: a former train station turned into contemporary art museum. I am sure everyone in Berlin has been to Hamburger Bahnhof, so I wouldn't even try to write a lame copy about this amazing museum. Only one note though: they offer guided tour in english every Sundays 12pm - I know it's early but it is so worth it to get explanation about the history of the museum and some of the important pieces, imagine all the facts you could drop at the next dinner party! You will be the star of the evening bb.

February 5th 2017
Berlinische Galerie
Alte Jakobstrasse 124 - 128, Berlin 10969
U1, U6 Hallesches Tor
U8 Moritzplatz

everyday except Tuesday 10 am - 6 pm
Admission 8 eur, 4 eur every first Monday of the month

The minimalistic stairs connecting the ground to the top floor is indeed very #instaworthy
I feel like the collection here are very well curated, though I was here for only around 1.5 hour it was very impressive and I really want to revisit. Even though this one so far look like the most normal building compared to kindl or Hamburger Bahnhof, it was actually used to be a glass warehouse.

And bonus point, if you spot the hoarder apartment on the way to the museum - it's slightly cooler than the art pieces outside the museum if you asked me.

February 12th 2017
Kunstlerhaus Bethanien
Kottbusser Strasse 10, Berlin 10999
U1, U8 Kottbusser Tor

Tue - Sun 2 - 7 pm
Admission free

Now located between Neukolln and Kreuzberg in a former Lichtfabrik, Kunstlerhaus Bethanien is work- and exhibition spaces for the resident artists mainly focusing on contemporary visual arts. 

February 19th 2017

The museum is founded in 1997 as the Deutsche Guggenheim; a collaboration between Deutsche Bank and Solomon Gugenheim Foundation and had its run for 15 years. In 2013 they parted ways and today the museum stand as Deutsche Bank Kunsthalle. I wasn't quite impressed as the space was relatively small and the building was not as special as the former museums I have seen in the past weeks and there was only one exhibition and it wasn't exactly that great either (5 weeks in and I am an art critic now!).
Because it was a short visit, we decided to check out one other museum nearby.

everyday 10 am - 8 pm
Admission 4 eur, Mondays free admission
Unter den Linden 13, Berlin 10117
U6 Franzosische Strasse 
S1, S2, S25, S5, S7, S75 Friedrichstrasse

Daimler Contemporary
Haus Huth
Alte Potsdamer Strasse 5, Berlin 10785
U2, S1, S2 Potsdamer Platz
everyday 11 am - 6 pm
admission free

This museum saved the day! It wasn't too far and the collection was way more impressive. Located inside the really cool Huth Haus at Potsdamer Platz, it was a nice contrast, very refreshing to see contemporary art inside a cool old building. Fun fact, it is the ONLY imperial building in the area (Potsdamer Platz) that survived the war and also the wall is almost unscathed (not gonna lie, had to google what that exactly means) because the house -at that time ran as restaurant, wine merchant and wine bar got a steel skeleton installed (something really new for that time) to protect the wine on the second and third floor. How amazing is the power of wine, right! Santé!

February 26th 2017
Kunstraum Kreuzberg Bethanien
Mariannenplatz 2, berlin 10997
U1, U8 Kottbusser Tor

everyday 11 am - 8 pm
admission free

Residing inside the Kunstquartier Bethanien, where the Kunstlerhaus Bethanien (the one I went to few Sundays back) also used to be, the building has quite an interesting history and impressive façade. Though it was a hospital before, it didn't really give me the creepy-chills, but that's maybe because I went around noon and was full of sugar and caffeine after a bottle of Clubmate.

Kunstraum Kreuzberg/Bethanien is an exhibition space for contemporary art with a focus on current social and cultural issues. Central to the projects here are the meaningful contextualisation of themes and consideration for diversity, internationality, and local relevance.
The location alone is well-worth a visit. Such gorgeous building!

March 2nd 2017
me Collectors Room / Stiftung Olbricht
Auguststrasse 68, 10117 Berlin
U8 Weinmeisterstrasse, U6 Oranienburger Tor, S1, S2, S25 Oranienburger Strasse, S3, S7, S5, S75 Hackescher Markt

Tue - Sun 12-6pm

March 12th 2017
Neues Museum
Bodestraße 1-3, 10178 Berlin
U6 Friedrichstrasse S1, S2, S25 Friedrichstrasse, S5, S7, S75 Hackescher Markt

everyday 10 am - 6 pm, Thursdays until 8 pm


Wednesday, January 25, 2017

Broke In Berlin

At this point we are all already sick with the saying that Berlin is poor but sexy. I would say it's still a sexy mess, but poor? Cost of living here has increased a whole lot in the past few years. Hip areas inside of the ring with the coffee shops, art galleries and artisanal shops are not affordable anymore, and you would need around €450 min. to secure a room in a flatshare and obviously more when you opt to live alone. With millions of us escaping our identity crisis countries, it is especially competitive to find a well-paid job, so we ended up selling ourselves short and settle for that 'social media' job at that très chic startup in Mitte with very minimum wage that barely even cover our crazy-expensive rent.

So, yes I am broke in Berlin. That's not the end of the world though, living here since May 2016 I have been navigating my way to survive and have fun (this is of course very subjective!) in Berlin with very minimum budget. I love to find good deals (partly because of my asian genes, but mostly because I'm broke AF) and reading of others' Geheimtipp, so I thought I could also share a thing or two about being a brokeass almost-adult in Berlin.

(You can find more info by clicking the links attached obvs)


We all know Mark Zuckerberg is the devil and Facebook sell your private data and keep showing you how amazing everybody else has it and that we basically now living in Orwellian / Black Mirror dystopia but! despite all that, if you are lucky and fast enough you can actually get cheap to free stuffs on Facebook, from advice, photo session, gig tickets, ikea mattress to (unwanted?)friend request.

Free Your Stuff

Free Advice Berlin 

Free Activity Berlin

Sell Your Stuff Berlin

Sell Your Furniture Berlin

Sell Your Clothes Berlin


Obviously cooking at home with groceries you get at turkish supermarket or discounters like Aldi, Lidl, Netto or Penny is the thing to do when poor is life but sometimes you just have had enough of eating leftovers 3 nights in a row or enough of Mi Goreng to cure your hangover woes and you feel like you deserve actual food cooked by big, strong hands that would comfort your empty belly and overall void in your life.

Taco Tuesday at Santa Maria Eastside taco and tequila shot at 1€ each ayyyyy

Salami Social Club has 1€/slice of different pizza selections every Thursday and also All You Can Eat on Sunday. If you feelin' like #TreatYoSelf for one of those special days, why not spend a bit more to good pizza - I made a Berlin Pizza Map where you can find supposedly best pizza in Berlin.

Hamy (Hasenheide 10) has cheap viet eats, around 4-5€ per dish.
Mabuhay (Köthener str. 28) has indonesian food in big portion, most dishes around 6-7€
Arirang in Charlottenburg and New Arirang at Warschauer got relatively cheap korean eats and a portion there could feed like an entire family

If you are also hungry for food and also for human contact, why not join Let's cook together Berlin group where you can meet new people and cook food together. I mean you can also do that with your friends obviously.

Art & Culture

Appreciating art is so important especially for your overall sanity and social media presence. Look! Another instagram post of Chiaru Shiota's Uncertain Journey with a Gingham filter.

Museums / art galleries / historical sites:

List of museums with free entrance (pro tip: Don't be a dick and posed or take selfie at the Holocaust memorial)

You can visit The KW Institute for Contemporary Arts for free every Thursday from 6-9pm.
Akademie der Künste every Tuesday 3-7pm.
Deutsche Bank Kunsthalle every Monday.
Museum for Film and TV Thursday 4-8pm.
More museums and info here.

If you are serious about checking out museums in Berlin, why not get the Annual ticket for the Staatliche Museen zu Berlin. I got the basic membership for 25€ granting me access to museum like Hamburger Bahnhof, Neues Museum, even the Pergamon Museum during off-peak hours (for example you can come at 11am - 1pm on Saturday or Sunday, after you get in you can stay as long as you want)

The visit to the Reichstag building is free of enterance you just have to register online or few hours before your visit at the Visitors Service.

Every summer there's Long Night of Museums (last year on August 27th) where you can visit lots of museums in Berlin for way cheaper. Early bird tickets 12€ / normal 18€. Sucha fun experience, though quite tiring - plan your route, bring water and snacks and wear comfy outfit. At the Naturkunde Museum you could even drink cocktails (!) with the dinosauriers

More art museums and galleries this way.

Films & Music & Dancing:


Every Saturday midnight there's a free silent movie screening at Babylon

Mondays, Thursdays, Sundays free movie screening at Köpi 137 a berliner squat / community center

Sameheads in Neukölln also screens cool film for free (also free popcorn!!) every Wednesday 9pm.

Kallasch& in Moabit also occasionally has Filmnacht& + Drink aus dem Film where you can watch cool cult movie for free and enjoy the drinks from the movie.


The Berliner Philharmory offers free lunch time concert every Tuesday.

Die Hochschule für Musik Hanns Eisler as well as die Universität der Künste offer concerts with free enterance occasionaly. Check their events here and here.

For the young and broke, for the champagne taste on a beer budget, if you are under 30, you can get ClassicCard membership for €15/year which allows you to buy last minute (1 hour before it starts) tickets for opera and ballet performances for really cheap. 8 euro for concerts and 10 for opera and ballet.


If you're feelin' dancy head to Clärchen Ballhaus, go on Monday to salsa your pain away (free enterance from 9pm on), Disco-Tuesday (free enterance from 9pm on), Swing on Wednesday, or Cha Cha on Thursday.

Bohnengold as far as I know also always let you in for free.

I am socially awkward and a bad dancer so probably not the best person to consult about the club scene in Berlin. Soz.


So you have just read the Communist Manifesto and now woke AF but you just need to get this object that could create the perfect illusion of 'the better version of you'. What to do?!
Buy it secondhand via Ebay-Kleinanzeigen, Kleiderkreisel, Sell Your Stuff, at your local Flohmärkte, Humana, Resales and other secondhand shops.

(I really want to do secondhand shopping post soon, so that's coming soon!)

It's really not that hard to find books stacked outside your doorstep or in the streets of Berlin "zum Mitnehmen", but if you're looking for soemthing in particular and better curated, head to St.George's in Prenzlberg or Curious Fox in NK for cozy bookshop atmosphere and stacks and stacks of secondhand english books.

You can also buy secondhand books here, free shopping if you purchase more than €10!

If you've come to terms that you are a horrible human being and would like to punish yourself but also train yourself in case zombie apocalypse is actually happenning, go to Primark at Alexanderplatz and Ikea at Tempelhof on a Saturday.

I have yet to go to Dong Xuan Center in Lichtenberg but friends have told me this is the place to buy your asian groceries and knick knacks and useless shit that you don't actually need. Yay capitalism!

Other tips and ways to save money


I know we all hate the BVG and the only good thing about them is probably their social media campaign but with the regular monthly public transport ticket you can take someone with you Mo-Fr from 8pm on and all-day during the weekends. The ticket is also transferable, which means you can lend it to your flatmate when you're away or like sick or something. If you use the public transportation often and you're thinking to settle for a bit in Berlin it's probably make sense to subscribe for a monthly card. At €63.42 you're saving almost 20 bucks per month than if you're buying the regular monthly ticket.

Sometimes you just need to take a cab because ur a kween and u deserve it. I normally use mytaxi, they have mobile app you can download here: IOS Android, also every few weeks they would give out €10 off code.

Beers: Sterni, mostly costs 80 cents at your local Späti. Alternatives; Schultheiss, Pilsator, Berliner Kindl.

Birthday specials:
To celebrate the day you were born (which you didn't even asked for, SMH) and capitalism, why not try some of these..

  • Free boat tour of your choice from Reederei Riedel with this coupon
  • Now that you're old and need some Zen, why not treat yourself to some spa and wellness? You get 50% off Liquidrom entrance ticket or if you want to go further, you can go to Bad Saarow Therme  or maybe Tropical Island for free on your birthday
  • Up your beauty game, get your brows waxed for free at your nearest Benefits Brow Bar

Wednesday, December 28, 2016


  • be the girl of my own dreams*~~
  • get a tattoo
  • move into a somewhat decent flat
  • make a website
  • write more
  • take more selfie - post more selfie
  • drink more water
  • get a working visa
  • vacation to spain/morroco/greece
  • more weekend trips  I went to Brussels/Lille, Basel, Italy, Munich so far this year
  • less FOMO

Monday, December 19, 2016

where the pizza: Best Pizza in Berlin

Do you sometimes find yourself pondering, 'where is the best pizza in berlin?' -because same.
The thought crossed my mind again last night, the same thought I have every night before I go to bed.

So I decided to take serious action by asking where is the best pizza in Berlin to people online.

Here is the list of best pizza in Berlin visualized on google maps (few places didn't make the cut because they were rated lower than 3.9 stars)

Feel free to share the map and add your favorite!

Sunday, October 23, 2016

NO means NO

I'm just listening to Jeff Buckley and rereading old conversation on Whatsapp (exciting sunday, I know). I had this conversation a few weeks a go. Backstory: I found out I got a job and celebrated by blind booking a holiday - being not blessed with good luck I got Düsseldorf. 
What I lack in luck I make up in being sneaky I guess, I decided to go to Amsterdam via Düsseldorf.
But because I got a night flight I still need to stay for a night in Düsseldorf anyway before going en route to Amsterdam. Being broke and the trip so last minute all the hostels are booked, I don't know anyone there, and I didn't feel like spending mad money to stay at a hotel (Probably should've done it #treatyoself) --soooo Couchsurfing was my last resort.
I got 3 guys saying I could crash at their place and decided to stay with this indonesian guy. Yes, because I'm indonesian. So probably easier to bond or whatever.
Ok long story short, he lives in a one room apartment. There was a bed and a couch. He insisted that I take the bed, I refused but he insisted and I was mad tired so I decided to take the bed.
He then complained about the couch being uncomfortable- which made me uncomfortable.
Then he asked if it was okay if he could sleep next to me. Dude. No.
I said I could just take the couch so he could sleep in bed. But he said he doesn't wanna be a bad host yada yada
And he would ask me again. He in fact asked probably over 10 times if he could just sleep next to me. He also tried to touch my arms, thighs when he told me to go back to bad.
Basically I didn't sleep at all. I got my phone in my hand because I was so scared. But because he was playing the nice guy / nice host I could not confront him. 
Of course I'm not stupid, I kept thinking to leave too. But that means I need to pack my stuffs and change my clothes and I thought it was a risky move :(
I know worse could've happened. 
But it IS NOT okay that I had to put up with this. Just because I'm staying over doesn't mean I owe you anything. I said no once and that should be clear enough. No means no.

The other day, a guy I used to see texted me saying he's in Berlin these days and wonder if he could see me again.
I politely declined saying I'm seeing someone at the moment so I don't think I should see him, and wished him to have a nice time in Berlin.
He insisted that the guy I'm seeing would never know and I should meet him. He even called me 'lil kitten'.
This of course was easier. I just blocked his number and he be gone.

Just feel like sharing bits of my stories. Of course this wouldn't change anything, but if I could get you to read this and think "wow women have to put up with this shit everyday. I better be nice and not creepy" that would be really cool

Although probably you would just blame me on going to stranger's place, stating it's my own fault and perhaps I post 'inviting' selfies on my social media etc -which quintessentially victim blaming and slut shaming me but that's okay I guess. That's just part of being a woman.

Monday, September 12, 2016

berlin diary #01

I graduated from university earlier this year. I know, what an exciting time! No more preparing presentation about sex tourism and discussing about Foucauldian discourse analysis, or essays on behavior in public place a la Goffman.
It's an amazing feeling to accomplish something that you thought you bound to fail. That lasted for a good 5 hours, it worn out and got replaced with this immense fear of your uncertain future.

I moved to Berlin now, like million of privileged 'millenials' (ugh I know, milleanials..) trying to find ourselves while clutching Clubmate under our armpit, sucking on rollies while navigating our way down Weserstrasse. It's been fun, an endless buffet of beard / tattoo / manbun combo, a never ending summer, girls who look like they belong on Tumblr, pale ales and Sterni, Instagram worthy arty bars slash art space, coffee, I could go on..


Deep inside I am constantly trying to distract myself of this unemployment, or loss of sense of direction.. funny how your future could not be located via Google Map.

I don't send mass application. Because I am a picky bastard. I know I couldn't afford to be picky. Last Thursday I attended an assessment center thinking this will be it.
Finally I can afford to live on my own at a cute little one room apartment, maybe in Neukölln or Prenzlauerberg (although let's be realistic, it's most probably Moabit or Wedding). Finally I can buy roses every few days, that YSL lipstick I always wanted and a flight home, Bali vacation. Anyway, I didn't get the job --which shattered my heart in million pieces. It's my fault though I got carried away.

You see a recruiting process is a like dating. We were sending email back and worth, even gotten to have a video chat, I had my expectations, I thought they were the one. I thought they'd want me too. Well they don't.

I am okay now though. Ok, who am I kidding, I'm still sad. They took the life I wanted. It was so close, I could almost taste it. But like a heart break, once you loved someone, you know that you will be able to love again. And maybe they're not the right one anyway. This is all for the best.
This is a bad metaphor, isn't it?

So yes, despite my colorful looking social media feeds, I am broke and hella unemployed. Hire me?

Saturday, October 17, 2015

The New Romantics: Love and Consumerism in the Modern

(Originally written as uni assignment and titled: Romantische Liebe 2.0: Liebe und Konsum in der Moderne)
Written by: Patricia Novanti

Love. One simple word. A never ending stories, interpretations and concepts. Today the concept and idea of “Love”, such thing as “Soulmate”, “The One”, “Mr. / Mrs. Perfect” is pretty hard to grasp. What is love even mean? Is it even real? Can I order it online and get it delivered to my house within 5 working days? Since when does love become something so complicated, so repulsive? Literature and Art show us how easy love is, how natural and beautiful. Where did we do wrong?

Let’s take a little detour and have a little look on the history of love.

Long time a go marriage is considered as a medium that connects two families into one, a kind of collaboration, if you will. Say, you are a king and would like to have a better relation with the nearby kingdom, marrying your daughter to their son sound like a perfectly good idea. Marriage therefore inherit a functional value, be it political or economical.

Fast forward to the 18th century. A lot of changes has taken place, from the social structures to the marriage arrangement. Slowly there were whispers and talks about this new thing, a romantic love they said. It was written all over books, carved into dainty sculptures, shown in theaters. It was told from mouths to ears, from one village to the next one, spreading so fast like a virus outbreak. This romantic love now has an All-In-One function, a one stop shopping for Love + Marriage + Sex. The person we shall marry is the person we love, a friend, a care-taker, a mother or father to our child. The romantic love is not rational, she is chaotic but she is natural. We know her not only through leather bound books or copies of Shakespeare’s plays, even in the pop culture we might stumble upon the essence of romantics. In the 90's with boyband culture, a song from Backstreet Boys perfectly encapsulated the idea of romantic love,

“...I don’t care who you are / Where you from / What you did / As long as you love me…”

The attraction in romantic love is so abstract, so vague, hard to explain and put into words. Important keys in romantic relationship are exclusivity, perpetuity and interdependence. The concept is, that there is someone out there who is 100% right for us, who will accept us for who we are.
The reality though isn’t as pretty as Disney movies. The “perfect love” is 7000 miles away from us, he is across the ocean, he has a mole on his face, or even worse: he has a girlfriend.
We then ask ourselves, does this love thing really exist? Where can I find it?

Slowly we noticed yet another changes in our lives and society, it’s everywhere, from the technology to our ideology. All these new we call “modern”, or the modern society.
With the industrial revolution that first started in England and France and now almost the entire surface of the earth people are urged to move to cities, in pursuit of better living, like such thing as The American Dreams. Another character of modernization is mobilization, rationalization, division of work, individualization, globalization and growth of information, technology and capitalism. 
What follows after mass production is mass consumption.
Love, now is also a commodity, love is also being consumed.
After all, since the beginning of time love has always been inherited an economic value, but today the play between Love and Capital is getting even more complicated. Eva Illouz coined the term “Consuming Romantic” for this phenomenon.
She mentioned cars have quite a big role in this consuming romantics. Cars move people, cars mobilize. Love that before is a private matter, something that is shown and done inside the house. With the rise of industrialization, more and more cars are being produced and introduced to our everyday lives. Cars take lovers to the cinema, to go dancing, to fancy restaurants. Mobility enable the bloom of tourism and other leisure and recreation industries, something that is now considered as base of social construction of the modern love relationships. Leisure activities is where love meets consumption. Love today is expressed through dates, going to cinemas or romantic getaway to Bali.

Different from the past, people in the industrialized countries, or the the Periphery and Semi-Periphery according to Wallerstein’s World System Analysis, are now able to live better, to be able to afford their basic needs and granted the opportunity to reach for the higher needs. With the shift from Fordism to Post-Fordism, people are able to work less, given more free times. This allows Selbstverwirklichung, self-actualization and building a more extraordinaire biography than it was possible in the past. Other than that today we are given abundant amount of products to choose from. We buy water with nice packaging (cough Fiji Water cough) and stuffs we don’t even need because of their shiny pictures in magazines or ads on TV. The key is to trick people into buying the idea that is shown in pictures through exchange between money and goods. Romantic love is often used in the packaging and advertisement to sell products. Romantic love is often idealized as happiness, as something beautiful.
In today’s modern world consuming stands in the middle. Consumers also can dictate what is to be produced. People consume things not only to cover their basic needs, but people also consume to define themselves, as a mode of self-presentation. I buy fair handle organic coffee because I care about others wellbeings and to prove that I am a better humanbeing than you. Consuming is now an act of building and showing your identities and so much more. Consuming is an act of showing affection. Isn’t that the new romantics to spend monthly paycheck to splurge on someone who gave their heart to us?
After all, how could I let the people at the bar know that I am interested in them if not through the act of buying them a fancy drink?
Gifts are being exchanged, on Valentine’s day, anniversaries, or even with no reason at all. Love is materialized, if you like it then you should have put a ring on it. Rings, Roses and Teddy bears are now marketed as something romantics.
The original idea of romantic love that we knew since the 18th centuries is now labelled as the new romantics, Love 2.0: it comes with nice packaging and a price tag.

Society and its components change constantly. It is hard to keep track of all the things that are happening and it’s hard to label or name the society we are in, not only because of the constant change but also because they way we view the world may differ from other people. Zygmunt Bauman propose that we are living in the Postmodern  or what he called as “ Liquid Modernity”, a step further from the modern society.
Today we still crave the idea of romantic love. The idea is very good, but perhaps too good to be true. Maybe love is just an advertisement, a propaganda or an utopia.
Maybe and just maybe, if I buy that toothpaste my teeth will turn sparkling white, so bright my prince will be able to find me! I shall be happy then.

But in reality love is hard to find  and most of us just give up the idea of it. After all, in the present, it is me and myself that is all that matters.

But sometimes there are lonely days, maybe when it rains, maybe on the walk home from work, maybe at the park during afternoon jogging session, or when a certain song being played on the radio, maybe in the shower or in the depth of a sleepless night.

We give love another chance, but this time with caution and a little hesitation.

In 2003 Zygmunt Bauman published his book, Liquid Love, and even after 12 years it still is relevant. Today with the ever increasing amount of serial monogamy and where “Dating Culture” is a thing people talk and write about, we still eager to believe of a thing called love but also clever enough to handle it with more or less rationality.
In the time of self-actualization, we put ourselves first, before anything else. We need our free times, we need space. So even when someone special come along, we are still used to that disposition. On one hand we want a significant other, on the other we want to collect experiences and live to the fullest. To be trap between security and freedom is then the underlying consequence.
We find ourselves in a relationship with someone yet invest minimal effort, because only so will we be able to avoid the pain when it eventually comes to an end, and only so we are able to move on.
Now “love” or romantic relationship is being consumed. To be with other people, to collect number of partners and experiences −that is ironically the complete opposite of the romantic love that values the quality of relationships.

In the Postmodern, like Bauman said, everything is liquid. The unity of love, marriage and sex in the old romantics has vanished. To sleep with someone doesn’t mean to love that person, or to have desire to live with them forever; One Night Stands and Friends With Benefits is now normalized. Bauman’s Liquid Love is fragile, filled with anxiety, afraid of commitments, weights and the future.
Capitalism, Consumption, Individualization or as a whole: postmodernization is affecting human relationships, love, affection and leading us to an even more depressing state of being.